Being free, trying new things, seeing the world. That has always been my thing.

So I harvested melons in Australia, picked apples in New Zealand, taught snowboarding in Austria, checked in hotel guests in Spain, tried out big city life in Berlin and found my new home in Switzerland. Mountains, nature, snowboarding, mountain biking, living in a motorhome – a dream come true for me. And yet something was missing: more meaning and self-determination in my job, a better salary, future prospects. But I didn't ask for more. And I stayed. I also had little self-confidence and was often insecure when dealing with other people. On top of that, I was in a relationship that took a lot of energy and increasingly drove me to despair. Nevertheless, I clung to it desperately.

Are you familiar with such lazy compromises? Better a job that only moderately fulfils you than the uncertainty of trying something new? Better a poor salary than a potentially unpleasant conversation with an uncertain outcome? Better a painful relationship than none at all? Better to stay strong, it'll work out somehow...?

The sudden end of this relationship finally led me to the right questions...